Here it Comes Again!

I know all of you are familiar with those times when all night long you struggle with an impending issue – a “how to” – how am I going to work this out? how am I going to pay this bill? how am I going to make it through this test? how can I mend this relationship? how can I make it another day like this?

I am in one of those “how to’s” right now. I have a student who is very cavalier, doing barely enough to get by, goes out of class when it’s time to report and stays out, has been known to text on her phone during classtime – all the symptoms of someone who has been used to getting away with some things and because of her attitude I’m sure previous professors just didn’t want to deal with it. Here she is in my class and approaching graduation – why do I have to have this problem? For in the age of accountability that we live in, if I let her get by – then I will be viewed as mediocre – I just really began at this school and I am on trial more so than she is!

I have to do something today – I can’t let it go on further – it’s tough for I know her “sister-girl” attitude – I’ve seen it before – in fact it’s the kind of attitude that I try to avoid – and it’s also the kind of attitude that I passed over just a couple of years ago- it’s come around to me again.

So I went to bed with this issue – God give me wisdom – let me fair – don’t let me bring another experience into this one – let me hear You and give me grace – grace that sees each person as an individual and not representative of a “type!”

I heard the Psalmist in my spirit declaring, “early will I seek You,” because I woke up early with this on my mind – but when I referenced the scripture I saw another one from the book of Isaiah and it spoke to my h eart:

8 Lord, we show our trust in you by obeying your laws;
our heart’s desire is to glorify your name.
9 All night long I search for you;
in the morning I earnestly seek for God.
For only when you come to judge the earth
will people learn what is right.
10 Your kindness to the wicked
does not make them do good.
Although others do right, the wicked keep doing wrong
and take no notice of the Lord’s majesty.Isaiah 26:8-10 (NLT)

Here it comes again – another test – another opportunity to show what it is right and what is righteous – I don’t know what the outcome will be – there are some people bent on doing wrong – and even the kindness that is shown them “does not make them do good,” but we do good anyway, we are kind anyway, we love anyway, we don’t hold yesterday’s hurts (and it does hurt when you try and try again to reach hard hearts and then end up having to answer to your superior for the misdeeds of another) -and yet, here we are again -yet here we are also seeking God early – with faith that this is a new day with new mercies and new grace and this time, with this student, it will be different.

God Bless You,
Maria